Defensive Driving and Longhorn Offensive

Growing up in Houston has taught me a variety of life skills that may have otherwise been absent. How to speak proper Spanglish. How to entertain yourself for over an hour just to go 20 miles down the road. How to tame hair in 100% humidity. And of course, how to drive like a maniac while calling it “keeping up with traffic.”

Defensive Driving has kept several speeding tickets in multiple states off of my record. I’m not sure that I would have a license still without it. For all of you who are judging me, spend a week in the fourth largest city in the United States and you’ll understand my expensive habit. These regulatory encounters with American’s finest have provided me with ample material for a future in late night television.

“I clocked you at 75, the speed limit is 35.” “Wow, I really did hit those breaks!”

“Why were you in such a hurry ma’am?” “Why are you slowing me down if I am obviously in such a rush, sir.”

“Do you know why I’m giving you a ticket?” “Because you’re an Aggie?”

My personal favorite explanation as to why I just can’t seem to slow down is best explained through sports. You see, you’ve got to have an offense and a defense to play the game. I feel as though the offensive line is lacking and I’m only trying to make the game more interesting. I exist to add a little bit of excitement to an otherwise dull commute.

In all seriousness, a little bit of offensive driving goes a long way in the form of safety. Probably not in the way I described above, but there have been plenty of overly cautious drivers that have caused one too many wrecks because they just won’t go for it. Their defense was their demise.

I’m thinking the same can be said for the American Church’s advertising strategy. It has been built on a foundation of defensive, reactionary, or internal efforts. The average church spends most of its advertising dollars internally, promoting new sermon series, small groups, ministries, and upcoming events. In the off chance that an external campaign is adopted, it is likely to be cautious in tone. Simply put, churches do not want to be viewed as close-minded or overbearing so they seek to persuade gently or “just put it out there” like an F.Y.I. notification.

Although safe, is this sufficient?

In a society full of advertising clutter, brands have to go above and beyond to get noticed. If I needed a friendly reminder of your church's existence, I would do a Google search. If you want to meet me where I’m at, you’ve got to try a little harder. Church communicators, did you read that?

I already know where your church is at, for my iPhone tells me so. I know you are having some kind of event because you added five minutes to my commute with your traffic getting into the parking lot. By the time I get wind of your new sermon series, you’re on to the next one.

Furthermore, religion in general is a controversial subject, so if the Church is trying to go for the soft sale, it’s already working against itself. People are more likely to have an emotional reaction to direct mail sent from a church than they are a local cable provider. The sender itself gets peoples’ attention.

So lets flip this around. The Lord knows we need to up our offensive, Texas. Lets get creative and stretch our minds further than internal announcements and potluck dinners. Guerilla marketing can take on a whole new meaning when the one who created primates is on your side. One way to kill creativity is to be too afraid to try. When church advertisers are too afraid to offend, their potential for change is grounded before it ever gets the chance to fly.

A good defense keeps you in the game, but the offense puts points on the board. But then again, what do I know? I still have eight hours of defensive driving to get out of my last Speed Racer episode.